Women's "English" | ::: Daily Humour :::

Monday, December 04, 2006

Women's "English"

I LOVE this! All guys should keep these in their heads to understand women better because women do not always speak in full sentences HAHAHA.

You probably read this many times already, but there's no harm in getting a refreshers course!

"Yes" = No

"No" = Yes

"Maybe" = No

"I'm sorry" = You'll be sorry

"We need" = I want

"It's your decision" = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

"Do what you want" = You'll pay for this later.

"Sure, go ahead" = I don't want you to.

"I'm not upset" = Of course I'm upset you moron.

"We need to talk" = I need to complain.

"You're so manly" = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

"You're certainly attentive tonight" = Is sex all you ever think about?

"Be romantic, turn out the lights" = I have flabby thighs

"This kitchen is so inconvenient" = I want a new house

"I want new curtains" = and new carpeting, new furniture, new wallpaper, etc...

"I heard a noise" = I noticed you were almost asleep

"Do you love me?" = I'm going to ask for something expensive

"How much do you love me?" = I did something today you're really not going to like

"I'll be ready in a minute" = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV

"Is my butt fat?" = Tell me I'm beautiful

"You have to learn to communicate" = Just agree with me

"Was that the baby?" = Why don't you get out of bed and rock him until he falls asleep

Answering the question, "What's wrong?"
"...The same old thing" = Nothing

"...Everything" = My PMS is acting up

"...Nothing, really" = It's just that you're such a jerk

1 comments:

Freaky Freak said...

I received an email notification that Jaxon S has left a comment on this post.

Comment: some of them also found their way to men's english... :)

I'm sorry I'm unable to publish it as this comment is not in my comments list. I guess it is a Blogger bug.

And my reply to Jaxon S: Great come back! I like it!!

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